Bachelor Colton Underwood Goes to the 'Fantasy Closet' with Demi: 'Does She Not Have Parents?'January 15, 2019
Welcome back, Bachelor Nation. It’s week two of Colton Underwood‘s quest to find love, and Chris Harrison kicks off Monday’s episode by showing up at the mansion to casually inform the women that even though they’re all friends now, it’s not going to last. Oh, and “time is everything.”
As if they needed the reminder.
It’s time for the first group date! Scoring a coveted spot are Demi, Bri, Tracy, Elyse, Hannah G., Nicole, Onyeka and Catherine.
Staying true to this season’s theme of “let’s bring up Colton’s virginity at every chance we get,” the group date is all about revealing your “firsts” — get it?!
The women meet Colton at a local theater, where Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman explain the rules. Each woman will take the stage in front of 200 people and tell a story about the first time they did or felt something significant in their lives.
As the women start preparing their stories, it becomes clear that they are planning to use the opportunity to show Colton a “different side” of their personalities. (Most stories end up being some variation of their dating history and preferences and how Colton is finally everything they’ve been looking for.)
Meanwhile, Demi promises something bold — and boy, does she deliver.
“So I met this guy at this really crazy party and I really wanted to kiss him, but I was just way too scared,” she says. “Usually when I see something I really want, I am bold enough to go after it immediately. I had to tell myself, ‘I’m not waiting any longer.’ When I want something I’m going after it.”
Demi then jumps off the stage and plants a kiss on Colton, who looks a little terrified, if we’re being honest.
“And that’s the story of how I got the first group date rose,” she declares.
Later that evening, the group heads out for the evening portion of the date. The first woman to steal Colton away is — surprise, surprise — Demi. Annoyed that she got the jump on them, all the other women use the opportunity to trash Demi for kissing Colton in front of everyone.
Tensions get even higher after Demi jokingly picks up the rose, which apparently is a huge Bachelor no-no.
But while Demi’s confidence appears to be at an all-time high, Colton decides to give the first impression rose to Elyse after she opened up to him about being 31.
She’s so brave.
ONE-ON-ONE WITH HANNAH B.
It’s always telling who gets chosen for the first one-on-one date of the season. This time, it’s Hannah B. We don’t know too much about Hannah B. at first, except that she was Miss Alabama 2018 and competed in Miss USA against fellow contestant Caelynn.
Colton shows up at the mansion to whisk Hannah B. away on their date, which just so happens to fall on her 23rd birthday. The two drive out to Vasquez Rocks and ride horses to a deserted spot with a hot tub. (I wonder if that’s there year-round? No? Weird.)
Everything seems to be going swimmingly until it comes time for Hannah B. and Colton to talk. When she’s unable to come up with a champagne toast, Colton starts getting a little nervous.
“I feel like so far this date hasn’t gone like I was expecting it to,” says Colton. “I felt like it was going to be this really easy, natural flow. If she could open up just a little bit and if we can make any type of progress, I’ll be happy with that.”
I mean, it is AWKWARD, people.
Unfortunately for Hannah B., things are looking a little bleak as she heads into the dinner portion of her date with Colton. He literally has to beg her to open up.
“What I wanted to say to you today when I knew I needed to kind of open up but I knew I just wasn’t ready… Why are you a virgin?” she asks.
The two manage to make enough
cringe-worthy insightful small-talk for Colton to feel comfortable giving her the rose.
SECOND GROUP DATE
By the time the second group date rolls around, the remaining women are practically foaming at the mouth to spend time with Colton. Alex, Erika, Katie, Caelynn, Sydney, Tayshia, Nina, Kirpa, Caitlin, Courtney, Cassie and Heather all head off to Bachelor Summer Camp.
With the help of comedian Billy Eichner (who casually kicks the day off by asking Colton if he’s gay), the women compete in a series of summer-camp style games in order to win more time with the man of the hour.
“I’m glad you waited to have sex until you’ve found someone who can successfully do a three-legged race,” Billy jokes.
The women are split into two teams, and after competing, the red team (consisting of Heather, Alex, Katie, Tayshia, Caelynn and Cassie) wins and gets to go to an outdoor cocktail hour with Colton.
Heather uses the opportunity to reveal to her big secret: not only is a virgin, but she’s never been kissed.
After spilling the secret, she assures Colton that she is actually ready for a commitment and could see herself getting serious with him.
He seems to take the news well but doesn’t pick up on the major “please kiss me vibes” Heather is throwing his way. Instead, they sit in awkward silence and hold hands like good virgins do.
“I thought we might kiss, but not tonight,” she says.
Still, she gets the group date rose.
COCKTAIL PARTY & ROSE CEREMONY
Going into the cocktail party, tensions are running extremely high, especially for the contestants who’ve had little to no time with Colton. Things only escalate when Demi, being the confidence queen that she is, interrupts his conversation with Tracy to steal him away to the “fantasy closet,” a secluded room upstairs, while wearing a robe.
The other women are NOT happy, with some speculating that Demi is trying to steal Colton’s virginity.
“Does she not have parents?” Caitlin asks as Tracy storms off in tears.
Really, she gives Colton an over-the-shirt massage. But the move was certainly enough to make her this season’s “villain.”
“The second I walked downstairs the girls were like, ‘Do you know what you did to Tracy?’ And I’m like ‘No, I actually have no idea what I did to her’ because I was up there with Colton having a great time and I wasn’t thinking about Tracy for even half a second.”
Finally, the rose ceremony rolls around’ and Colton ends up sending Angelique, Annie, Alex and Erika home.
The Bachelor airs Mondays (8 p.m. ET) on ABC.
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