Why Jamie Otis and Doug Hehner ‘Went Over 9 Months’ Without SexOctober 9, 2020
Doing it their way. Jamie Otis made a major revelation about her sex life with husband Doug Hehner.
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In a candid Instagram post, the 34-year-old Bachelor alum shared how the pair’s lovemaking changed the day they found out that they were expecting their rainbow baby.
“This is the day our life & marriage changed … in MANY ways for the better, but our sexual intimacy went straight out the window,” she wrote on Thursday, October 8, alongside photos of the duo holding pics of their baby’s sonogram. “Bleeding during sex while pregnant is 100% natural. I know this as a labor and delivery nurse. Yet, after we had sex and I saw blood I panicked.”
Otis continued, “I was so careful not to share these fears publicly [because] I didn’t want to put any negative energy out into the universe. Doug and I both agreed that we wouldn’t have sex during the first trimester ‘just in case.’”
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The reality star said that “any bleeding during pregnancy” causes her to “panic.” That being said, the duo chose to not have sex “nearly at all” during her pregnancy with now-4-month-old son, Hendrix.
After giving birth to their youngest child, engaging in sexual intimacy was “the last thing” she wanted to do.
”We went over NINE months not having sex. Sex after babies isn’t necessarily always easy & honestly, I was scared of it. BUT WE DID IT!” she explained. “We have made a vow to each other not to give up on one another. We’re trying to spend more quality time together and re-build our intimacy-not just sexually, but overall. We’re doing it for us *and* for our children.”
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Otis and Hehner, 36, tied the knot in 2014 after meeting on the first season of Married at First Sight. They announced that they were expecting their first child in 2016, but they lost the baby at 17 weeks. She gave birth to their 3-year-old daughter, Henley, in 2017 and their son Hendrix this past May.
Last month, the couple revealed on their “Hot Marriage. Cool Parents.” podcast that they “still haven’t had sex” since their youngest’s son’s arrival.
“[Someone] said, ‘Jamie, you don’t put out,’ and I wanna be like, ‘Excuse me, girlfriend. First of all, I had a 9-pound, 4-ounce, baby tear me to shreds downstairs and then at my six-week appointment, I had to have a colposcopy, so I couldn’t have sex again for two weeks. And then I had the [loop electrosurgical excision] procedure and couldn’t have sex again for two weeks. I don’t feel like having sex, because I’m frickin’ depressed! I don’t feel sexy, I don’t feel hot; I’m anxious, I’m insecure,’” Otis said, adding, “So you’re right, I don’t put out. And it’s not that I don’t love my husband immensely and it’s not that I’m not attracted to my husband — it’s that I’m not attracted to myself and that I’m depressed.”
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