Our druggie son won't eat our food because he's convinced we're trying to kill him

Our druggie son won't eat our food because he's convinced we're trying to kill him

February 14, 2022

DEAR DEIDRE: MY son accuses us of trying to poison him and refuses to eat our food.

Then he swears at us and accuses me of having an affair.


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He’s 35 and a regular cannabis user – has been since his teens. I think that deep down he knows he has issues but is worried about getting treatment.

I am 71 and my wife is 67. We do see glimpses of the son we know and love occasionally but he soon slips back into violent rages and doesn’t speak to us for days on end.

We mostly go out ­– anywhere just to get away from him.

He has a very easy life and got everything he ever asked for growing up. He’s very spoilt, still lives at home and doesn’t contribute a penny to the household.

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We suspect he spends all his money on drugs.

I have tried to get him to a doctor but he refuses to go. My wife and I are at our wits’ end.

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DEIDRE SAYS: He’s an adult and responsible for his behaviour. But he’s making your lives a misery.

He can’t get help unless he accepts he needs it.

Tell him how much you love him and want to see him well. Explain you need him to be working towards living independently and he can only continue to live with you if he gets help.

You can find support through Adfam, who help families affected by drug and alcohol problems (adfam.org.uk).

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