My little girl walked in on me and my lover and I’m terrified she’ll tell her dad

My little girl walked in on me and my lover and I’m terrified she’ll tell her dad

September 26, 2020

DEAR DEIDRE: MY little girl walked in on me and my lover having sex – and now I’m terrified she’s going to mention it to her dad.

My lover and I are on the same sales team and are both still working from home. We’d grown close when we were office-based and our flirting got heavier during lockdown over Zoom. I am 35 and he is 33.


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When restrictions eased we managed to meet up a few times and had sex in his car.

It’s not that comfortable, but the sex was still hot. However, we could not wait for our kids to go back to school.

I have a little girl aged six while he is also married and has sons aged four and seven.

My husband is out six days a week as he has a senior job in retail while my lover’s wife only works part-time, so it was safest for him to come round mine. Last week my daughter was off school with a bug but she was sound asleep and I thought it would be safe enough for my lover to come round.

We almost tore one another’s clothes off as soon as he came through the door and we were soon having sex up against the kitchen island.

We were both panting and groaning so I didn’t hear my daughter come downstairs. She came into the kitchen saying, “Mummy, I feel sick”.

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She looked half-asleep and wandered off towards the loo. I pulled my clothes back together and went after her, while my lover tiptoed out the door.

She was sick a few minutes later and back in bed asleep soon after that. She’s OK again now but I am so scared she’s going to say something to her dad about seeing Mummy with a strange man in the kitchen.

My only hope is that my husband works long hours and doesn’t pay her all that much attention when he is home. He doesn’t pay me that much either — and that’s partly why I’m having an affair. He is 42.

We’ve been growing apart for years and our sex life is boring. I know I’m being selfish but I don’t want to end my affair.

On the other hand I can’t see my lover leaving his family, and I don’t really want to throw away my very comfortable home and daughter’s family life either — but she might do it without realising.

DEIDRE SAYS: If a week has gone by without your daughter saying anything, it sounds as if she didn’t take in the implications of what she saw in her drowsy state.

But you are playing with fire and this affair isn’t going to end happily unless you start being realistic.

Your husband must have seemed like the right guy for you when you married so tell him that you both need to put more energy into your relationship and revive your sex life. 

My e-leaflet 50 Ways To Add Fun To Sex can help you stop straying. And of course, cheating risks transmitting Covid too.

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